When I was growing up, movies were a big part of my life. From sleepovers, to birthday parties, to family gatherings. There is a great expanse of films that bring on sentimental nostalgic feelings. Watching these films as an adult, particularly with my child, brings waves of memories and warm feelings that expand through the decades. As her eyes light up at the special moments that lit mine in that same way so many years ago, I can’t help but be lit up again.

There is another thing, however, that also occurs while I watch these films. Many realizations come to light. Realizations that, as a small boy, sitting in a darkened room, I had no idea what the heck was going on. Let me take some time to share a few of these movie misunderstandings with your right now.

GHOSTBUSTERS

            Let’s kick it off with a classic, Ghostbusters. Now, when I was little, we used to celebrate many holidays at my grandparents' house. My uncle lived in the basement. He was a massive movie buff. He had hundreds upon hundreds of cassettes, filed away in his many storage displays. Many of which were still sealed in their cellophane. It was a glory to behold. Every gathering, we kids would take turns picking out movies to watch. Although we gathered together on numerous holidays each and every year, we pretty much stuck to three films: Beetlejuice, Back to the Future, and Ghostbusters. Sure, we would throw in the occasional Crocodile Dundee, or Indiana Jones picture, but these were the trinity.

            Now, Ghostbusters is one of those films that likely has many layers and themes that a child might misunderstand, but there is one scene in particular that made me go, “huh”, as I came to the realization of just how wrong I had it.

            We are introduced to Peter Venkman in a scene featuring a play on the old Milgram experiments. As a young child, this scene was so important. It was meaningful, and was so essential to the plot, it was not to be missed. There was that great tension and music cue, and that guy dropped a peanut out of his mouth. Seriously, I thought it was a peanut. Only, the scene is none of those things. It wasn’t even a peanut at all! Yes, the scene is fantastic, and a very important moment that gives us insight into one of the greatest characters of all time. But, as far as plot goes, very much not in there.

(couple-a wavy lines?)

            As a little added piece, I give you this. As a child I had never seen filing systems with little cards in it. Perhaps I wasn’t paying any attention whatsoever, but when Venkman grabs a sample of some guys nose blow from the library, I did not recognize it as oozing from a long, opened drawer at all. I just thought it was some ghostly protruding bone thingy, or some such. Perhaps I thought that the ghostly entity had transformed the basement into some unholy layer of protrusions and slime? I don’t even know. I would love to have a conversation with this kid, now.

(couldn't be a drawer, it's oozing)

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TEEN WOLF

            Teen Wolf, the classic story of a wolf who plays basketball. Years ahead of Air Bud. Let’s start simple. When I was a kid in the early eighties, we were one of the lucky few who had a VCR. The thing was massive and clunky. We owned very few movies, as they cost an arm and a leg, but we did record a lot off of cable. One of these cable tapes was Teen Wolf. Or, as it was labeled by my mother, “Team Wolf.” For so many years, this is what I thought it was called, “Team Wolf.” Why not? It made sense. He was a werewolf, and he played on the high school basketball team. It was no more a stretch than the film’s premise.

            Speaking of stretches, this next thing I cannot even begin to explain. When I was really young, there was a good length of time that, while eating string cheese, I would chew and chew and chew before eventually giving up and swallowing. Why? Because if you chew string cheese long enough, it becomes chewing gum. This was the belief that I had come to based upon several viewings of  Teen Wolf. I honestly have no idea how I could have come to this conclusion. What I do know is that it is based on the coach who is always chewing away at gum. I recently watched the coaches scenes to try to make sense of it. Did I think that the marker he was holding in his office was a stick of string cheese? I may never know. Again, I really need to speak with this kid.

(cheese)

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CHILD'S PLAY -OR- PET SEMETERY

            As our final entry in this volume of movie misunderstandings, I give what can be seen as a twofer. When I was really young, as small children are, I was terrified of scary movies. Also, as small children do, I pretended not to be.

We were visiting my Aunt, Uncle, and cousins in North Carolina. We all went out and rented a handful of movies. One of those movies was a horror flick. I was not allowed to watch this particular selection. I was shunned from the living room, while the older kids and adults sat and enjoyed the movie that I assumed was “Childs Play.” Or, simply “Chucky,” as most kids, I assume, called it. The movie had been on for some time. I was getting very bored and antsy, so I decided to take a peak. What I saw was Chucky burying a knife into a man’s heel as he walked, then fell down a flight of stairs. I freaked out and ran from my hiding spot to be terrified alone, hiding, this time, from the living doll that would undoubtedly get me if I stepped out from behind the shower curtain.

            For years and years that image freaked me out. Until I grew up and it was just a silly memory of youth and Chucky. Eventually, I watched Chucky. The entire series. Every film I watched, I anticipated that scene. Chucky, hiding under a stairwell, cutting a man’s foot with a massive knife. I never saw it happen.

            Just this year, for the first time, I watched “Pet Semetery” on Halloween night. And there, I finally saw it. A small kid, hiding under a stairwell, cutting a man’s foot with a small scalpel. It was neither massive, nor a knife, and it was most certainly not Chucky. It took decades, but the mystery was finally solved. Why my parents never corrected me is far beyond me.

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            So, there you have it folks. A few glaring misunderstandings of films, of life, of whatever. What I have come to notice while thinking about these specific occurrences is that, while they may not be as drastic or silly, perceptions of films, or art, or even past situations can change with age, knowledge, or maturity. Even a film I may have seen only a few short years ago, seen in a different light or in a different frame of mind, can mean or seem a lot different. I think that is part of what makes movies so fun to watch, viewing after viewing. Thinking about how it made you feel the first time you saw it, thinking about how it makes you feel now, and sharing these moments with others.

Thanks for reading, all.

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--BONUS!--

THE BARBARIANS

            Contrary to my belief, this film was not a live action version of He-man, as I tried to tell my parents when I was four. They did, however, agree to record it on the aforementioned VCR and preview screen it for me. Needless to say, I was both wrong, and never allowed to watch it.